Baby's first footsteps


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Totally true. When I was 16, my best friend and her family invited me to go to Misquamicut Beach with them for the day. No big deal. But for me, it was HUGE. When the water splashed up into my face, some of it got into my mouth. Guess what? I yelled, “why is the water so salty?” They all laughed at me! I didn’t take offense, I laughed too. That’s when they discovered that it was the first time I had ever been to a beach.

On July 6th 1970-something I got my first period. I was either 11 going on 12 or 12 going on 13, and when I got it I didn’t tell my mom. In fact, all she had in the house were those belted overnight hospital pads. No way was I about to use one of them! For the first two days, I used toilet paper that I stuffed with cotton balls.

First time a boy held my hand, I was 14, he was my first boyfriend, Mike. He was also the first boy I kissed. Super soft full lips!

I’m not ashamed to admit this, but I took the written Driver’s exam five times. I always missed each exam by like one point. (Test taker I am not.) The drivers part of the Driver’s exam I passed the first time.

Another first…. Guess how old I was when I went to my first rock concert? Go on, take a guess. Not only was I “old” for my first concert, but I went to see James Taylor. I was 35!

My first flight? I was 19, it was Eastern Airlines. They served a hot meal and you could smoke on-board. I flew from New Jersey down to Florida.

Ronald Reagan was the first president I voted for.

Bought my first car when I was 20, a Nissan Sentra.

I was lucky enough to get my first yeast infection at 19.

I was 23 when I got married for the first time.  Bought my first house at 25.

The first time I made Thanksgiving dinner I was newly married, 23, and because my ex-husband was a chef, he de-boned the turkey so it would cook faster. Think about that. I wanted a Martha Stewart turkey with all the trimmings. But what did I get? I got turkey parts in a pan with stuffing in another pan. Ask me how long it was until I made another Thanksgiving dinner? Like 15 years later.

Joined the ‘mile high’ club at 50! Got braces for the first time at 50. Went skiing for the first time also at 50.

The first time I went abroad, not like Canada or the Bahamas – I’m talking across the Atlantic – was a culture shock. I felt like I was seeing Italy through the eyes of a child. Everything was stunning, breathtaking, historical, like you felt as if you were walking back in time. The charm of old-world countries never gets old.

This may sound odd, but when I was in 8th grade, I got my very first compliment on my skin. I thought it strange, but heck, it was nice to hear.

I was 26 when I became a mother for the first time. The experience was life-changing. When I see photos of my body after having a baby at age 26 – and again at age 38 when I had my last! WOW WOW WEE WOW

When I was 19 I saw someone take a spoon with some little white rocks in it, then lit a lighter under it. I was CLUELESS. That same person stole $300 out of my wallet. That was the first time I felt distrust.

First time I played ‘Truth or Dare’ was the first time I showed a boy my breasts. I think I was 11.

The first time I owned a dog was the last dog I will ever own. Got him when I was 46 and he passed away when I was 51.

First time I was 19.

First time I was ever scared was in 1969 – I was four years old – I watched the Wizard of Oz -that wicked witch of the west and those flying monkeys!

The first movie I saw that wasn’t Disney related was Jaws. The first R-rated movie I saw (by myself in the theater) was An Officer and a Gentlemen.

First time in a porno theater, I was 18. My friend and I went to a matinee and there were maybe five men scattered in the seats. We couldn’t quite understand why the men were making so many squeaking noises!!

If you liked this little article, I would be grateful if you shared it with your friends.

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