Biting my Tongue

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“I pray myself in my own way 😢 or is there a right or special way to pray ?

I hear my sister is always saying Jesus will help but I think she doesn’t have the faith that one needs to get answers from God; she was married for 44 years her husband passed two years ago. She has only one daughter and three granddaughters the last one is 20 years old. My sister worries so much about them because their mother doesn’t tell my sister there’s nothing she can do for them other than pray to the Lord to keep them safe. It’s a long long story to be put on, and don’t have that much knowledge to put it down, I do what I can, just need some prayers for myself.

I say to myself I’m ok but right now I’m taking care of my sister in my house because she had back surgery last week and as much as I’m happy to have her we us, at the same time I say “Dear Lord give me patience to understand her because she doesn’t want to understand the consequences of the surgery and the process to recuperate.”

She nags, she doesn’t listen to any suggestions, and really is driving me crazy. I just have to bite my tongue not to tell her I’m taking her back to her house and she can take care herself – but I won’t! Any suggestions from anybody in the group 😢 please?” -Martha

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14 thoughts on “Biting my Tongue”

  1. Thanks everyone it’s really helpful all the advice; she’s doing well at this point next dr. Visit is in 5 days then she’s going back to her house for what I see and heard what she said going back with a good memories;
    Thanks God ,, Your messages really helped me a lot

  2. I agree with the rest who say be honest with her, don’t baby her, and send her home asap. Then you can go visit her with tea and cookies. Good luck and be strong. Because she has to learn how to be strong for herself so she will heal.

  3. In the meantime, there’s a good book called “Are You Running With Me Jesus?” It’s about stressful lives. Hope you can find a copy and things will settle down for all you and your family.

  4. Share your feelings and thoughts with her. Let her know how you are being impacted. Be authentic and honest with a mix of empathy and you will get through.
    Ask for what you need from your sister to make this arrangement work and ask your sister what she needs too. This way you both have the opportunity to get what you need and you can stop providing whatever is not needed and preserve energy.
    Remember to care for yourself too, do this first.

  5. Sickness stresses everyone….it’s ok to vent to each other your feelings ….holding feelings in will cause you to blow a fuse…..don’t walk on egg shells ….I did that for years with my daughter….not healthy….speak your mind…..if you both love the Lord….you will forgive and move on.

    1. Try to put limits on her behavior like a 2 year old, ” I love you but all your needs are met, here’s your water, tv changer, a snack. I’ll be outside for 20 min.

      1. As soon as you can, I would take her back to her house! She needs to realize she can get up and do things for herself! And if she can’t, she can hire someone to baby her. I had two hip surgeries and with one had to use a walker and hop on the good leg for 30 days! You can do what you have to do!

  6. I’ve learned the hard way not to let family treat me that way. You’re doing everything you can for her. I would confront her about it and if she gets upset about it let her daughter take care of her. You take care of you cause no one else will. I will keep you in my prayers. Bless you

  7. Friend, God has you with her for a purpose. Family is the worst, I am sorry, to take care of. Some expect so much from you, because you are family. That is just not fair. There is no reason you can’t tell her in a firm and loving way that she is in your home, you are doing the best you can. Doesn’t sound like her surgery was life threatening, thank God. Or, if she is so unhappy she can go home with a care taker. God bless and keep you💜

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