What Did I Do

“Many years ago I fell out with my sister who was the main carer for our Mum as she lived with her…

I helped with Mum as much as I could although I lived an hour away, had three children and a part time job. I took her to doctors, hearing appts., hospital appointments, had her stay with my family to give my sister a break. Took her on holiday, had her stay or stayed in Mum’s house while my sister went on holiday, but it was never enough and one day I just walked out. I still did the same things but my sister and I never really had a conversation after that.

I tried to make amends to no avail; she just cold shouldered me. It took me a long time to come to terms with the situation as I couldn’t understand what I had done wrong.

When Mum passed away I met her in the hospital and said, “perhaps we can be friends now” and she said I never want to be friends with you again! I haven’t forgotten this and when I met her recently at a family member’s funeral I didn’t speak apart from “hello” because quite frankly I didn’t know what to say and it wouldn’t have been the right time to bring up the past.

We haven’t really spoken in about 20 years, even when I had cancer there was no contact, when my son passed away from cancer not so much as a sympathy card. I feel tempted to write to her so she she can explain what I did that was so wrong. What should I do?” -Anonymous

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